Do you often feel you pull your weight in household chores – but your partner doesn’t? If so, you’re not alone.
Arguing over household chores is one of the most common disagreements many couples have. I know of several couples whose main complaint about their relationship is that the other doesn’t help with housework.
Many times one partner feels as if they are responsible for most of the housework, and begins to resent their significant other because of a lack of participation.
So what can you do to remedy the situation?
As with most issues, housework often comes down to communication. The first step is to open a dialogue with your partner.
Here are 6 specific recommendations on how to talk to your partner about household duties:
1.) Tell your partner what you want or need without being judgmental. Be respectful and avoid criticisms. Never start a conversation with “You’re lazy!” This will only lead to anger and will make the situation worse.
2.) Present completing housework as the problem. Never make your partner feel as if they are the problem. Be open with your partner that you need help with housework without placing the blame.
3.) After you make your request, be open to ideas and suggestions from your partner. If you don’t agree with your partner’s ideas, stay calm and discuss alternatives.
4.) Bring up the subject while spending time with your partner. Don’t make it seem as if this is the only topic you want to discuss. If you do, your partner will become defensive immediately.
5.) Be friendly, open, honest, and make it personal. You can say “Darling, it would make me so happy if you would take out the trash when the bin is full.”
6.) Realize that small steps are important. Don’t expect big changes overnight. Transitioning from not doing housework to assisting with housework will take time.
Remember to say “Thank You” to your partner each time they finish a chore or helps with yours. Showing appreciation is easy and lets your partner know you are grateful.
So tell me, have you and your partner argued about housework? If so, how did you handle the situation?
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