Have you been out with your girlfriends lately having conversations – well complaints really- on how it has become boring and stale?  The fact of the matter is we often complain and focus on what we are not receiving from our significant other.  Yet, we do not focus on the lack of what we are GIVING.

“Keeping the fire burning” is more than just a phrase to say.  This phrase requires action from both parties- Venus and Mars.  Like the old saying goes, “It takes two to tango”, there must be TWO to keep the spark burning.  No matter what is causing the distractions or interruptions, whether it is work, the kids or simply the lack of time, you both must jump the over the hurdle and succeed together. If your focus is not there and the hurdle looks too tall then close your eyes right now.  Imagine the first time you saw her or him.  Do you remember that one thing that was so irresistible-nothing could keep you away from approaching your partner?  All you need to do is remember what attracted you to each other and start from there.  The list that follows can be a guide.

1. Looks

Was it his smile, his eyes or how gorgeous he looked in his pink shirt and tight denims that got you to almost topple over in those insanely high heels?  Was it your long, shiny hair, your sexy red lips or your tight behind that had him follow you around like a lovesick puppy?  Plan a surprise dinner date and dress to kill.  Walk with an air of confidence and make heads turn.  Let yourself shine.

2. Smarts

Sure, you are no Einstein but do you remember how he used to get amazed at your responses to his statements?   How he would comment about how interesting and fun it was to talk to you?  While your smile got him to notice you, it was your quick wit that got him hooked.  It may be time to regale him again of your brainpower.  Men, in general, appreciate a woman who can be intellectually stimulating, even find it sexy.

3. Laughs

Work, the kids or the stress of having to juggle both can get exhausting at times that we forget that we have locked our sense of humor in one of our closet drawers. Be playful and spontaneous. Have a good laugh with your man while watching TV, over glasses of wine or even in bed. Relax, have fun together and just enjoy the moment.

4. Physical Intimacy

No one can deny that a healthy intimate life creates more bonding. Talk. Communicate what pleases you.  Be open about your desires and fantasies. Again, talk and then, experiment.

What’s the one thing you find irresistible about your partner?


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