… You’ve got to make your marriage last so…
It isn’t just a catchy tune — get it running through your head so each and every time you’re angry, frustrated, distracted, over-pressured or even just plain sad, you’ll have a communication tool sitting right there waiting. When you’re moving too quickly, either literally or figuratively, there’s no possible way you’re going to really hear what your partner is saying. That’s especially a problem when you’re in a less-than-ideal mood.
There’s a reason for the “stop” part in the “Stop. Drop. And Roll, Dick Roll” commercials. It stops that momentum that is making things worse. When you’re in a foul mood, for whatever reason, you’re less likely to take the mental energy to truly listen. You and your partner may be having a discussion or argument that is perfectly legitimate – these things do happen, after all – but you’re both speaking about entirely different issues and only slipping in the response to the other for etiquette’s sake. STOP!
“Wait a minute, Honey. I think we’re/you’re/I’m just too flustered right now to be discussing this efficiently. What exactly is your issue here? You explain and I’ll be quiet and then it’ll be my turn.” It may sound like a teacher trying to solve issues of a playground argument, but it works. And your relationship is worth it.
Play heed, and you’ll both be… feeling groovy.
To find out more about my services click here: Couples Counseling