Contrary to the message that the professional, multi-million dollar marketing companies out there are trying to sell, the most important purchase you must make for before birth is neither the crib nor the stroller, not the room decorations and not even the early-reader dvd set.  The most important purchase you need to make is a tasteful set of dishes for two, plus a tablecloth, candleholder and candle and a pair of wine glasses. 

Often, an exhausted couple of new parents will put off their “us” relationship for a while, under the guise that Baby is the one that needs the attention now.  This is not a good approach for your relationship.  Your little one is going to stick around.  Once your relationship with each other is put on the back burner, the inertia that temptingly sets in may well keep it there. 

Understandingly, new parents may well be either unable or unwilling to leave a newborn with a babysitter.  This is why the purchase list described above is important.

A new mother, especially if she is breastfeeding, is probably feeling tired and overwhelmed.  It is important to her that she still feel cherished for who she is. 

Print out this article and put it on the fridge while you’re still pregnant.  Use it as reference after your birth.

Plan a date.  This is where your date-dishes set comes in.  You may need to plan your nights out as nights in for a while.  That shouldn’t stop the romance.  Order  takeout.  It doesn’t need to be fancy or expensive, it just needs to be something that neither of you takes precious time and effort to prepare.

1.     Book your date ahead of time.  Work out which night would be best. 

2.     Pay attention to yourselves.  Look sharp. 

3.     Set the scene.  This new set “for two” is only for these occasions.  You’ll have a number of them over the years and they’re marvelous opportunities for a change of pace.  Set the table to look inviting and elegant, just as if you were in a high-class restaurant. 

4.     Yes, you may have interruptions.  Take them in good speed.  You won’t be kicked out of your dining room if Bundle of Joy has a crying spree and yes, it is inconvenient, but with your practiced patience, it’s a surmountable challenge. 

As tempting as it may be to prioritize your little one over yourselves, you’d be doing Junior a disservice in bending to that temptation.  Your children need happy parents that love each other and you need to keep that flame burning.

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