As quarantine lifts in many areas, relationships are adjusting to the outside world. For some couples, quarantine has actually helped their connection. For others it’s been an ongoing struggle.
Benefits of Quarantine
The increased contact inherent in quarantining together has helped build trust and connection for some partners. If there have been trust issues in the past, or if one or both partners suffers with anxiety, staying close may have helped. When couples are home together, there are fewer potential triggers, such as trust issues, having trouble reaching each other, or one spouse coming home late after work.
An added benefit of being together all day is that partners get a better sense of each other’s responsibilities, whether those are work or home-related. Many have improved their empathy towards the other, improving overall communication and understanding.
Struggles of Quarantine
The challenges of quarantine are more obvious than the benefits. Any two people who are together nearly all of the time are likely to face conflicts, or simply get tired of one another. It can also be harder to take time for yourself, or have much independence outside the relationship.
As the quarantine began, many couples faced new challenges of sharing space and loss of privacy. The logistics of working within the same household can be complicated, especially if there are children at home, or if one or both jobs requires confidentiality.
With more time together, couples have also had more opportunity to get into conflicts. The adjustment from 40 or more hours a week away from each other to being together all of that time is significant. Couples may have not worked through certain issues until they came up during quarantine.
Moving Out of Quarantine
Next comes a whole new adjustment, for those who are returning to a workplace, or simply leaving the house more. This may be a relief for some, or may bring up new conflicts for those who found it a comfort to be together more.
It’s helpful to remember that just like when quarantine began, there will be an adjustment period to this as well. These tips can help you make this adjustment more smoothly:
- Stay connected. This could be through a lunchtime phone call, texting a few times during the day, or having a check-in period when you both get home.
- Respect each other’s new space. It’s normal for your spouse to go out into the world. Allow them to have their own experiences and autonomy outside of the relationship.
- Take care of your own needs. Recognize what needs you have, for independence or connection, or basic self care. Prioritize and add this back into your routine as needed.
- Constantly work on strengthening and nurturing your relationship. As this change occurs, you may need to communicate more of what you’re experiencing and needing. Express what you’re going through, while taking time to listen and understand your partner as well.
If you’re struggling with this step, or in general in your relationship, counseling can help. Our trained counselors know what it’s like to make these adjustments and can help you improve communication while balancing self-care with taking care of your relationship. Contact us today to make an appointment.
The Relationship Suite
We are a group of skilled therapists specializing in couples/marriage counseling. Since Covid started we have been working with couples providing Online Couples Counseling in New York, New York City including Manhattan, Queens, Brooklyn, Bronx, Staten Island, Long Island, South Hampton, East Hampton, Montauk. Schedule a complimentary consultation by clicking HERE.
Due to Covid we are also providing Virtual Couples Counseling in New Jersey, Hoboken, Jersey City, Princeton, Chatham, Morris, Westfield, Union, Bergen County, Colts Neck, Tenafly. Schedule a complimentary consultation by clicking HERE.