You are exhausted and had a very long day. You sit down on the couch and your partner starts talking to you. As soon as they start talking your mind goes to a thousand different places… Did I pack Sue’s lunch? Did I send that email to my boss? Shoot, did I forget to pay that bill!? A couple minutes later you realize you have not been paying attention to your partner and now they are waiting for your response.
If you are like most people, this scenario happens much more often than you would like to admit. With the many demands life places on us, is there any question our mind has trouble keeping attention to one thing or person. It can be easy to be around people physically, but when it comes to actually being mentally present and fully invested and engaged, this presents a problem for many.
When we are thinking about other things, we are not fully there to the people around us. Others can easily notice this and may eventually pull away. In fact, many couples come to relationship and marriage counseling because of that reason, not feeling heard. By practicing mindfulness, we are able to learn how to quiet all the noise and keep attention to the present moment. With the ability to better be present we are able to create connection in our relationships.
What is Mindfulness?
Mindfulness refers to the quality of awareness that a person brings to everyday living. It is the ability to be fully present, aware of where we are and what we are doing and to not be overly reactive or overwhelmed by what is going on around us. When we become more mindful, we are removed from the habitual behavior or thoughts.
Mindfulness is focusing on the present moment and on the people we are with now. With mindfulness practice, those you speak to will notice your increased ability to focus your attention and they will feel heard. In fact, couples who come to relationship therapy with us at The Relationship Suite say one of the most important things that helps in their relationship is that fact that during couple’s therapy they feel fully heard and listened to.
Every person possesses the ability of mindfulness and with practice it can become much easier to do. Mindfulness practice involve breathing exercises, guided imagery, and other tasks to relax the body and mind. Stay tuned for our next post where we will be discussing easy mindfulness exercises you can do with your partner to strengthen your relationship.
Not only can mindfulness can help enhance your connection with your partner, it can help you to be present in your own life. Life moves by so fast; children are growing up; family and friends are moving away, and we are all getting older. If we do not take a step to become focused on those people and things around us that are important, we may miss experiencing life with them.
Stay tuned for our next blog post where we will be posting Three Easy Mindfulness Exercises you can do with your partner to strengthen your relationship.
Online Couples Counseling at The Relationship Suite
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